Hmong Christian Network

Is bowing in Hmong culture a sin?

As a male Hmong, religious or not, sooner or later you'll run into having to bow in a traditional occasion.

> What do you do if you're a Hmong Christian?
> Is bowing to someone other than God as a Hmong, wrong?
> Is it just an ultimate act of gratitude?
> Am I really worshiping the individual when I bow to them?

I've seen many approach to this topic. It differ from people to people. Even from pastor to pastor. Recently, a few of our members had a conversation about this issue. Most churches, regardless of denomination, prefer not to bow down to anyone other than God. Amen to that. The very basics of the ten commandments tells us to not worship any other gods then Himself. When Daniel was ordered to bow down and worship the kings idol, he refused and was sentenced to death.

So then, what's so hard about not bowing down to anyone other than God? Well, in the Hmong culture, there are about 2 major occasions where a male Hmong will be required to bow. One of them is during a wedding and the other during a funeral. There are other occasions when bowing may be suggested, but isn't required. When it is, it puts Hmong Christians in an occurred position. More and more, I'm seeing less bowing at funerals from Christians. But I can't say much for Hmong weddings. Throughout a Hmong wedding, there are numerous times that bowing will be required. The bride's family expect and demands the groom and his family's ultimate respect by bowing to them; their grand parents in a third-world country, their clan, their dead ancestors, etc., you get the point. More often, even Christian family's demand this type of respect during a wedding. Hmong Christians usually apologize politely for not bowing at funerals when they give thanks, but I have never seen them even think twice about not bowing at a wedding.

As a first generation Hmong American, I was born in Laos, but came to the States when I was a toddler. I'm aware of some basic tradition, but don't know much about the details. Part of the difficulty in clearly defining if bowing as a Hmong Christian is acceptable lays in understanding the difference between what is cultural and spiritual. Our traditions for generations has been driven by spiritual acts and has embed itself into the culture.

As young Hmong Christians, we really need to be more assertive about our knowledge of the Hmong culture and it's traditions. The elderly Hmong Christians need to also take this more serious. They are our connection in understanding our history, tradition and culture. Without the two generations working together, many things will be lost and will continue the separation of Hmong Christians and non-Christians (this sounds like another post).

When looking at the bible as an overview, the old testament teaches how to act and behave as God's children. The new testament seems to go deeper and teaches us how to honestly feel as God's children. Can we say than that acting and behaving is an outer expression? And feeling is the inner truth? One can hide how they feel by controlling their behavior, but they can never hide the truth in their heart. What I'm trying to say is, I can pretend to be holier than thou, but God knows what's inside me. He doesn't want your manners. He wants your heart.

Bowing in the Hmong culture is an ultimate act of respect or gratitude in kindness and shouldn't affect who you worship or your faith. Unless you are to be bowing down to their spiritual belief, it is not against God or a sin. The truth in this is not that you shouldn't bow when you are carrying out an act of respect or gratitude, but that you shouldn't bow if it may cause someone else to lose their faith (Romans 14:20-21).

2008 Hmong American Baptist Revival, day 1 of 3

I had a blessed revival weekend.

It didn't start out that way though. On Friday, our first day of revival, my wife and I learned that our son Christian, age 7 had a fever and a minor seizer during a hospital visit with his aunt for her baby. We were very concern since he had not had it over 4 years. I was really looking forward in attending the revival, and meeting our guest Pastor and his wife from Texas. I felt upset that I had to choose between meeting my wife and son at the hospital or an evening in worship. I hoped to have been able to do both, but was only able to make one choice. I chose to join my wife and son. Before going to the hospital, I had talked to Christian on the phone. He was crying. He had been away for almost a week at his cousins and really missed the family. I can tell he was trying to be tough, but was afraid because of his past memories of his seizer experiences. I told him I loved him very much and not to be afraid, because I was going to go see him and everything was going to be okay. His little quivered voice gathered and gave me a shaking "okay." It was as if my assurance was the best medicine he had received all afternoon.

As I hurried to the hospital, I had a window of 15 minutes to make all the calls I could to alert my parents and the brothers at church about what was going on. My parents, actually my father, baby-sits my 3 younger kids. God bless him. My mom watches them too, but works in the afternoon and leaves around 2. As I called to let my father know I wouldn't be able to pick-up the kids until late, because Christian had be admitted into ER with a minor seizer, I found that the Lord and Savior had already beaten me to it. My mom had picked up the phone. She didn't go into work, because her boss had called for her not to go in that day. I was relieved, because it meant I could spend a little more with Christian.

I had to also make my rounds of calls to some of the brothers at church, letting them know of my urgent situation and that I wouldn't be able to attend that evenings service, along with the possibility of not making it for Saturdays revival too. You see, it was complicated, because Christian needed to be monitored overnight at the hospital and we weren't sure when he was going to be discharged so it hindered our weekend schedule.

I was to lead the church in worship during our revival and had many other things to prepare for. Above all else, the visiting pastor and his wife was scheduled to spend the night at my place. All of this needed an emergency plan of rescheduling. I had to get a hold of one of the deacons before the Fridays worship to let him know my situation, so a Plan B could be set up incase I was unable to pursue the original plans.

As I got to the hospital, I stopped by the gift shop and got Christian a gift and a "Get Well Soon" balloon. I figured it would bring a smile to his rough day. As I found my way into the ER, I saw him laying on the bed in a cold lonely corner of a curtained section with his mom sitting in a chair by his side. She saw me first and made a surprising look to gesture my arrival. Christian looked over and saw me. He didn't know if he should smile at the balloon and gift-bag or not, because his overwhelming joy of seeing me had crumbled into tears and his body gestered the need of a fatherly care. I softly leaned over in a hover and gentley huged him, carefull not to undo any of his IV lines. I leaned my head past his unto the pillow to embrace the warmth of his face and his quivering little voice brightened my life with the words of, "Dad, I'm happy you're here." I wanted to say so much more to him, but was only able to tell him that I was happy to be there with him also. His words, brought more light to my life that day. I didn't want him to see me get emotional and think that there could be something wrong. I only wanted him to think it was going to be just another routine doctors visit.

That evening, the three of us experienced the pure joy of the blessing that God has given us. Love, peace and family. We had a small dinner and prayed together. I spend as much time as I could starring at his beautiful face and into his gracious soul. I can't help but wonder, what have I ever done to deserve such a blessed life. And I now realize, my revival that day was not meant to be at the church, it was meant to be in a cold lonely hospital room with the grace of God's blessings.